Sandals won’t get you laid

Every once in a while I try to be the better person so I’m just doing my best to help out here. Wearing sandals as a dude will never ever, read it again and please imprint this in your mind; ne-ver e-ver, get you laid.

First of all. Jesus wore sandals, meaning this footwear has been around for ages and actually should have died a painful death several times already. Unfortunately it kept on resurrecting throughout time. It would practically be the same if we all started wearing the same garments they did in the Middle Ages. Ridiculous? Yes. Attractive? I don’t think so.
Also, you don’t fuck with Jesus, do you?

Second, they’re sandals.

Another argument. If you ask a woman which part of the body she strongly dislikes, she’s most likely about to say feet. Why the hell would you wanna show off something about 99% of the female population dislikes? And please don’t cover them up by wearing socks because you’re just not getting it, do you.

And last but not least, they’re freakin’ sandals.
Now just quit it. Get laid.


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